Marriage Requires Character and Commitment to be Successful


Marriage, with God’s help, can be heaven on earth when we manage to discover what the core elements of having a successful marriage are.

While stuck in traffic yesterday and seeking a distraction for my mind, I tuned in to our local talk radio station.

Marriage truly can be heaven on earth for the Christian couple. Character and commitment are the key to turning a fantasy marriage into reality.

The subject of the hour was divorce and what couples can do to remain connected in their marriages. The subject of divorce and how relationships can go bad has always intrigued me, so I enjoyed most of what the callers had to say.

According to the host of the program, California is known as the “Divorce Capital of the World” with Los Angeles leading the country with a 75% divorce rate.

I haven’t done the research so I have no idea if that statistic is true or not. But even if it’s not true, we all know that divorce rates nationwide are extremely high.

As I listened to the radio show, callers were calling in describing their particular marital situations and seeking advice on how they could save their marriages.

The more I listened to the show the more overwhelmingly clear to me what the core elements needed to make a Christian marriage work were.

Those elements are Commitment and Character.

Showing Commitment in Marriage

Some weeks ago I wrote an article on how love is not primarily an emotional feeling (see Love is an Act of the Will, not a Product of Emotions). I won’t rehash that information here, but in order to make any marriage work there has to be a commitment to make it work even when you don’t necessarily feel like making it work.

I don’t always feel like going to work, yet I go.

I don’t always feel like going to church, yet I go.

I don’t always feel like doing the right thing, yet I do it.

In most of the things we do in life, we don’t necessarily feel like doing what’s necessary. But due to an obligation, agreement, contract or commitment we do what we don’t always feel like doing. Why should marriage be approached any differently?

How can we expect a payoff in anything (including marriage), if we aren’t committed to investing the time and energy it takes to see the fruit of our labor?

Just the fact that we know our Father hates divorce should deter us from going that route. But even though we know the will of God where divorce is concerned, the divorce rate among Christians is just as high as the divorce rate among non-Christians.

Showing Character in Marriage

Character is the desire to do the right thing for no other reason than because it’s the right thing to do. Character is about core values. Character doesn’t seek its own pleasure or payday. Character shows an obligation to God and to self to live by a higher standard.

Within a marriage, character means treating your spouse with honor and dignity without requiring anything in return. For the person of character, the act of being loyal to a higher cause is their payoff.

Our Father will not allow His child to be bullied in Marriage

If you as a Father knew that your child was being bullied at school, would you stand by and allow the bullying to continue? No parent who loves their child would tolerate their mistreatment.

Do you think that God, the ultimate Father figure would allow His child to be continually bullied in a marriage? Absolutely not.

God not only loves us, but God is love. You are His child. Don’t you think that He will take care of you and protect you? God placed the desire within you to have a great marriage. Trust that He will see to it that you are given the desire of your heart where having a good marriage is concerned.

In Marriage, there are exceptions to every rule

In marriage, every couple and every situation is unique. I am not saying that no married person should ever consider divorce. There are issues of abuse in many different forms that should not be tolerated.

What I am saying is that when commitment and character are present within born again, Spirit filled Christians who want their marriage to work, there is no reason why they can’t have a marriage made in Heaven here on earth if they want one.

God can renew your marriage

No matter where you are in married life, God can renew your marriage to a state that is beyond brand new.

God knows you better than you know yourself. God knows how to touch places in you that you never knew existed. And God knows how to communicate to your spouse how to love you in ways that are beyond what you could have ever imagined.

Marriage truly can be heaven on earth for the Christian couple. Character and commitment are the key to turning a fantasy marriage into reality.

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  1. We remind each other often that "God loves our marriage more than we do." It gets us through so much to remember that.

    • Thank you Lauren for your pearls of wisdom! Sounds like you’ve found something that works for you. If you have any other pieces of advice, I please feel free to share them.

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