Marriage survival in a world filled with traps, snares and the appearance of evil around every corner requires effort. A part of this effort is setting rules and guidelines in which you and your spouse are willing to work within.
There are no hard and fast rules that couples should use to govern their relationships when it comes to respecting one another and respecting their marriage.
Take an inventory of the things you do, the people you talk to, and the places you go. Would an outsider who doesn’t know you consider these things to look suspicious?
Each couple must sit down and take the time to discuss what they consider to be threats to their marriage and where the sore spots are concerning their conduct with one another.
What dosen’t work well for us
One common avoidance of evil I’ve heard quite often in marriages is the sharing of an email account. Having a common email account puts any thoughts of inappropriate email correspondence with the opposite sex to rest. While I agree with the transparency of having a joint email account, this method of accountability doesn’t work for all couples.
For example, I run two online businesses and I have two email accounts that I use. Currently, the account that I use strictly for business has 4463 messages in my inbox and the one that has a mixture of business and personal messages has 2223 messages in the inbox. If my wife were to integrate her email with mine, she would never be able to find hers mixed in with mine.
What does work well for us
What does work well for us is GPS. My wife and I had this discussion before we were married and we both feel the same. There should never be a reason why either of us should have to wonder where the other is. There is safety and comfort in knowing that we can locate one another at the drop of a hat, therefore I, my wife and our 17 year old are on the same GPS network.
Take an inventory of the things you do, the people you talk to, and the places you go. Would an outsider who doesn’t know you consider these things to look suspicious? Going to lunch with your secretary, Instant messages coming in at odd hours, and not being where you are supposed to be when you’re supposed to be there can all be perfectly justified. But how would your behavior appear to an outsider? Think of how it might appear to your spouse?
There are things that you may have done and places you may have enjoyed going as a single that you can no longer partake in now that you are married. Be conscious of the fact that your life has moved on to the next stage. Put away things that singles do that could be detrimental to your marriage and give the appearance of evil.
How to Build a Strong Marriage
There are many different things that can be done within a marriage to avoid the appearance of evil. Respecting your spouse and respecting your marriage are full-time jobs. The key to finding out which rules to incorporate into your marriage is communicating with one another.
Be sensitive to the needs of your spouse. We all have our insecurities when it comes to ourselves and to our relationships. Our responsibility is to love God and to love the son/daughter He gave us unconditionally. A great part of this unconditional love is making the other party feel loved, wanted, and respected.
Don’t make the necessary changes and adjustments in your marriage because you agree with them. Don’t make the adjustments because you understand why your spouse is requesting them. Make adjustments in your marriage for one reason only. Make them because you love your spouse and are willing to do what it takes to make them feel secure in your marriage.
Just the willingness on your part the make your spouse feel secure will go a long way toward showing that you respect your spouse and you respect your marriage.