Marriage Commitment – Developing a Commitment Mindset

marriage committment

Marriage commitment. These words seem almost like and oxymoron these days. You may consider this a personal rant (and it very well may be), or a request for answers to a subject I just don’t understand.

What I don’t quite understand is how Christians who proclaim to know the almighty God, who claim that He is all powerful, who say that He is alive within them, and who lift up Holy hands in church on Sunday mornings can dismiss their marriage commitment and seek to divorce so easily.

How can Christians who proclaim to know the almighty God, and claim that He is all powerful dismiss their marriage commitment and seek to divorce so easily?

I realize the term “seeking divorce easily” is a relative term and your definition of easily may be very different than mine. Let me give you my definition of “seeking divorce easily” so that you’ll have a reference point to work from when you hear me use the term.

What I mean when I say “seeking divorce easily”, I mean seeking a divorce for any reason other than adultery, or abuse of any kind directed at either spouse or to the children.

Let me also add here that no one knows your situation better than you do. There can be extenuating circumstances when divorce is a legitimate option for you apart from reasons of adultery and abuse.

In this article, I’m dealing with situations when people seek to get out of their marriage commitment for reasons as simple as “I don’t like him or her anymore”

Marriage Commitment failure

Why do we as Christians feel its okay to just give up when things get tough in our marriages? Why is the divorce rate in the Christian community just as high as the divorce rate in the world? How could this possibly be when we have the power of the almighty God working within us?

OK, here is where the OCD in me is going to come out. Here is where the black and white traits that I willingly admit to having will show up….

The bible we live by contains principles. The bible doesn’t tell us how to live every single detail of our lives, but the bible does give us principles to live by that can be applied to every single area of our lives.

For instance, the bible doesn’t tell me to rub my wife’s back after a long day at work. But the bible does tell me to love my wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25).

The bible doesn’t tell me not to go on a business trip with a female business partner and share a 2 bedroom hotel suite with her, but the bible does tell me to abstain from the appearance of evil (1 Thessalonians 5:22).

Faithfulness yields Commitment

There is a scriptural principle given to us in Luke 16:10 that says, “He who is faithful in little will be faithful in much”. In my opinion, it’s the very small things in life that we overlook that can diminish our ability to be faithful in the larger things in life such as our marriage commitment.

Being faithful in little can encompass things as simple as crossing the street at the corner as opposed to in the middle of the block.

Making a point to be on time for your appointments as opposed to being late and dishonoring those who are left to wait for you.

Returning your shopping cart to the designated cart return area as the signs direct you to, as opposed to leaving your cart in the parking area for someone else to deal with.

Nothing in life is too small when it comes to being faithful in little things. Some people might say, “What does returning a shopping cart have to do with my marriage”.

Again, I say we aren’t dealing with the event of returning the shopping cart to the designated cart return area, as much as we are dealing with the principle of doing the right thing.

If we get in the habit of doing the right thing simply because it’s the right thing to do, we will develop a mindset that will carry over into every area of life including our marriage commitment.

Make a commitment in life to do the right thing. Honor your words. If you can’t commit to the words you’re allowing to come out of your mouth then don’t allow them to come out of your mouth.

As we begin to show ourselves faithful in the little things in life, the principle in Luke 16:10 will become alive in us and we will become a body of believers who are faithful in the larger responsibilities of life, including our marriage commitment.

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